I am a sophomore in college. I have already published one book. I am currently writing my second. So far in my life, I’m more successful than the average person my age. I have had some setbacks but that’s life.

The first setback is I changed my major three times this year. I declared as a Public and Applied History major, then changed to a History BA, and now I’m an English with Creative Writing Concentration major. I also have a history minor now. That’s because at this point I had spent to much time and money to completely drop history.

The second setback is that my family could not be more disappointed in me. I will be the first to admit that I have no idea what I’m going to end up doing after college. But my family is fully expecting me to teach or to do something in a controlled 9-5 job like them. But that’s not my plan and I can’t seem to get them to understand this. 

I fully comprehend how risky a writing career is. But that’s my passion. It’s what I wake up every day and want to do. I want to write chapter after chapter of my second book. I want to send out into the world for people to fall in love with. Or hate. I want to have it out in the world.

My mom shoved in my face the fact that I’ll never be successful. Her closing comment for the evening was “one big mack large fry”. She thinks that a creative writing degree will send me to work in a McDonald’s. And there’s nothing wrong with that job. But she also wants me to look into dropping out.

I was up until 4am trying to find a future path that will maybe please her. But nothing will. I have learned from asking her what she thinks of different options. In her mind, no one will ever stoop low enough to buy my work. No one will ever want to read my work. That I should go back into history and go to law school like we were planning. The thing is, I don’t have the personality to do politics. I don’t do 9-5 very well. The fact that I’ll stay up until 4 in the morning to argue a point should be argument enough against that fact. And god forbid that I end up working with the nation’s current president. I’ll be jailed before I could more than to comments out of my mouth.

I want to write. I want to change kids lives with books that way mine was. Staying up all hours to finish the latest Rick Riordan read. Making friends based off of my Harry Potter house shirt. 

But they’ll never accept what I want out of my own life.

Maybe it would be better to just do what they want until they die. Then I could be real about what I want.

If y’all have any advice for backup plans involving an English major history minor please let me know.